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Oftentimes, an intensive outpatient program such as the one offered by the Sexual Recovery Institute or an inpatient treatment setting can jump-start a sex addict’s recovery.For individuals with fused drug use and sexual acting out, both aspects of the addiction must be treated simultaneously, preferably in an environment where these issues are addressed as the paired, dual concerns they have become.It has also played a significant role in the de-stigmatization of homosexuality – especially among younger people. Unfortunately, the Internet has also facilitated sexual acting out for many gay men.For these men, even seemingly benign online activities can present a danger.The simple fact is today’s sex addicts, regardless of sexual orientation, locate sex partners via dating and prostitution websites, social media, and smartphone apps.The only real difference is gay men log on to Grindr, Manhunt, and Scruff, while straight guys use Skout, Blendr, and Ashley Madison.In some ways, the gay sex addicts are prisoner of their own autonomy, with fewer cultural opportunities for self-examination and less cultural support for behavioral change than the population in general. Many married gay men are no longer willing to put up with a partner who is out having sex with strangers two or three evenings a week.
Unfortunately for the gay male sex addict, his increasingly destructive patterns of behavior take place against a cultural background of dramatically greater sexual freedom than that experienced by other sex addicts.And the number of old-school gay men is diminishing by the day, as it becomes increasingly clear that if you want to get laid, you’d better get “with it” in terms of digital hookups.Recognizing this, a heavily updated second edition of – already a staple among gay men in recovery – is scheduled for publication later this month in both electronic and print formats. Compulsive, problematic sexual behaviors are not solely a gay men’s issue.For some gay men, drug use and sexual acting out are so intertwined that they form a single, fused addiction – if these men are doing one, they are also, without fail, doing the other.
Finding Recovery There are a lot of gay identified men, no one really knows how many, who utilize the intensity and emotional power of sexual fantasies and behaviors to self-soothe, distract, and emotionally medicate themselves in ways that not only go against their core beliefs and values, but also create emotional, health, relationship, legal, financial, and other consequences.Sadly, safe sex is rarely a priority for such men when disinhibited by drugs.