Self esteem and dating
Consistent with the first study, people with lower self-esteem chose more intimate conversation topics after viewing book titles focused on attaining rewards versus when they viewed book titles focused on avoiding costs.In contrast, people with higher self-esteem chose more intimate conversation topics after viewing book titles focused on avoiding costs versus when they viewed book titles focused on attaining rewards.You need men to tell you how to feel about yourself and without them you feel nothing. Since you don’t love yourself, you don’t understand why anyone else would love you.Even if a guy says he does, you’ll never be fully confident in that.
When reminded about the potential costs of meeting someone new (e.g., rejection), people with lower self-esteem behaved coolly (e.g., crossed their legs, looked away), whereas people with higher self-esteem weren’t as cool.
To find out, researchers examined how subtle reminders of rewards or costs and self-esteem affect people’s motivation to start a relationship.
In the first study, participants sorted words that were related to either rewards (e.g., ).
You start to prioritize every other person above yourself because you believe they matter and you don’t. You might have loved him, but even more so you loved the fact that he loved you.
You base your self-worth on whether or not a guy likes you. If there isn’t a man to want you then you feel worthless. You don’t find yourself beautiful or likable but when a man sees that in you, then it might just be true.
In other words, people were more likely to notice flirting when they were in certain conditions, and which condition they were more likely to notice it depended on their self-esteem.